Hope for the moment

Recently God blessed me by giving me the opportunity to be a part of a women's Bible study with some of my closest friends.  The topic was beauty.  Beauty is something that I have been obsessed with for a long time! I worry that if I loose weight I will loose it in the wrong places and gain it in the wrong places.  I worry that i will be repulsive to my husband but not know it.  I exercise and eat right most of the time but have recently almost given up.  I binge eat and feel hopeless frequently because I will never look like a model and lament that my post baby body will never look like it did before.  My husband is wonderful and always makes me feel beautiful and wanted and yet I don't look at my self and see anything other than ugliness, and still I eat and neglect getting up to work out.  The bible study Centered around realizing that God has explicitly mapped out for us a way to true beauty and it wasn't what I expected! I found myself realizing that i was going about it all wrong, and at the same time greatly encouraged because His way is so much more peaceful!  God showed me that He made my body (even my post baby body) for His purpose! In my pursuit of God, but taking care of my body should be with a kingdom purpose. The reason I work out and eat right should be so that my temple is better equipped for service.  My attractiveness to my husband is not just for our pleasure.  It is so that our marriage will bring Glory to God! When I seek him first, the rest of these things will fall into proper perspective.